Gadhafi Captured Alive, Khaddafy Dead, Qaddafi is Really Dead, is Gadhafi Dead or Alive and How Do You Spell His Fucking Name?

Filed under People, politics by on October 20, 2011 at 1:33 pm {13 comments}

Which one is it? Is Gadhafi dead or is Khaddafy dead. Was Qaddafi caught alive or is he really dead? Sure, there is a gruesome picture of Gadhafi, Khaddafy or possibly Qaddafi lying in a pool of blood with what looks like clown make-up on floating around, but do we know who it really it is?

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Is Gaddafi dead? Hard to know. I’d be inclined to believe any of these news sources except they can’t even agree on how to spell his name. It’s no surprise they can’t figure out if he is dead or not, they aren’t necessarily talking about the same guy.

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CNN went with Gadhafi

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Fox News used Qaddafi (he’s really most sincerely dead)

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MSNBC hedged their bets and used both Gadhafi (screw the apostrophe) and Khaddafy.

Why not, they’re probably right.

Why don’t we know how to spell his name? We’ve known all about the Libyan ruler, Moammar Gadhafi (I pulled it out of a hat, it could have been any of the different spellings) for decades, why couldn’t someone pin him down about the way he spells his name? Seriously, we can put a man on the moon but we can’t figure out how to spell his name? Same goes for Bin Laden, though there don’t seem to be nearly as many variations of his name floating around.

According to The Straight Dope, the US Library of Congress has 32 spelling variations for the the guy who might be dead, or not.

(1) Muammar Qaddafi, (2) Mo’ammar Gadhafi, (3) Muammar Kaddafi, (4) Muammar Qadhafi, (5) Moammar El Kadhafi, (6) Muammar Gadafi, (7) Mu’ammar al-Qadafi, (8) Moamer El Kazzafi, (9) Moamar al-Gaddafi, (10) Mu’ammar Al Qathafi, (11) Muammar Al Qathafi, (12) Mo’ammar el-Gadhafi, (13) Moamar El Kadhafi, (14) Muammar al-Qadhafi, (15) Mu’ammar al-Qadhdhafi, (16) Mu’ammar Qadafi, (17) Moamar Gaddafi, (18) Mu’ammar Qadhdhafi, (19) Muammar Khaddafi, (20) Muammar al-Khaddafi, (21) Mu’amar al-Kadafi, (22) Muammar Ghaddafy, (23) Muammar Ghadafi, (24) Muammar Ghaddafi, (25) Muamar Kaddafi, (26) Muammar Quathafi, (27) Muammar Gheddafi, (28) Muamar Al-Kaddafi, (29) Moammar Khadafy, (30) Moammar Qudhafi, (31) Mu’ammar al-Qaddafi, (32) Mulazim Awwal Mu’ammar Muhammad Abu Minyar al-Qadhafi

We may not know how to spell his name but we do know that Qadhaffi, Kadaffy, Gadafi….whatever, was indeed a cross dresser (yes, Kelly, it’s true). At least according to this reputable source.

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Man, there are some fucked up people in this world ( for the record and before everyone jumps on me, I could care less about the cross dressing, whatever floats your boat, I was referring to all the other crazy ass things this guy did over the years, as well as all the other megalomaniacs out there). Or, were, not really sure yet.

By the way, who let this happen? And why is he smiling?

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AP Photo/ Michael Gottschalk/Pool

 

 

 

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Let’s Get Back To Work America

Filed under Doing Things Differently, People, politics by on September 7, 2011 at 7:27 pm {7 comments}

President's speech to the joint chiefs, joint session of congress and Obama's address, Obama's job speech 9/8/11, Tomorrow night President Obama will address the American people and a joint session of Congress. He is going to present his jobs plan to the American people and the politicos on both sides of the aisle.

Why are we looking for the President to make a speech about jobs? Why are we waiting for him to create more jobs or at the very least, create favorable conditions to create jobs?

The only job the President can save is his own and I’m not even sure that is possible any more.

My issues are not with the President. My issues are with the American people who are waiting, like lemmings, for someone to put them back to work.

There was a time, not too long ago, when we were proud to be Americans. We made things, we built things, we invented things. We did great things and we were the envy of the modern and not so modern worlds.

Now we aren’t envied, we are hated.

And, we seem to hate ourselves.

Currently there are about 14 million people out of work who want to be working. That’s 14 million people collecting unemployment and looking for work.

American innovation, great American inventions, get America back to workRemember when we were innovative? Some of the best inventions came from Americans. We have created things that have changed the world. Bill Gates and Steve Jobs weren’t waiting around for the president to tell them how to find work, they went out and created jobs for themselves.

Along the way they changed the world.

What are we waiting for?

We have the internet, the great equalizer, why aren’t we creating all kinds of jobs?

It isn’t easy working for yourself but it is rewarding and you have job security. Of course, if you don’t make work for yourself the government isn’t going to send you a check. Those checks are for people who don’t have an entrepreneurial spirit.

If you have an internet connection you can sell all kinds of things.

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The great thing about Americans is that we buy all kinds of needless shit.

Have you lost some weight recently? Write a book. The weight loss industry is not faltering at all during this downturn in the economy and Americans always…ALWAYS, want the easy fix.

diet books in American, all different diets, how many diets are there, do diets really workNothing has really changed in the weight loss industry – eat less, exercise more. That’s it and yet hundreds if not thousands of books are published each year about how to do it.

And we gobble them up.

14 million people ought to be able to come up with some new, innovative thing that starts the next revolution. You don’t need a college degree to come up with one of these beauties, in fact, some of our most innovative people didn’t have college degrees. On the other hand, it isn’t too late to get your college degree, you might just learn a new skill that could change the world.

wierd american inventions, American innovation, pet rock, strange marketing from the 70sRemember the Pet Rock?

It was a rock for crying out loud but it made some industrious man a millionaire. And he didn’t even have the internet to market with.

There is nothing we can’t do and yet we are waiting around for someone to tell us what to do.

If You Build It, They Will Come

Find your inner baseball diamond and built it. If you don’t know what I am talking about go to Netflix first (another awesome American  invention) and rent Field of Dreams. Then, sit down and figure out what it is you can do and do it.

If you build it they will come, innovation, find your dream, build your dream, Take a risk.

How bad can it be to fail? Trust me, some will fail. But it is through that failure that we find great success.

Come on America, let’s stop waiting around for the government to find us jobs, let’s create our own.

It’s time to be proud to be American again.

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Minnesota: Where Even The Criminals Are Practical

Filed under People by on July 13, 2011 at 8:28 pm {19 comments}
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Image via Wikipedia

Back in 1987, Howard Mohr wrote a funny little book that taught non natives of Minnesota how to talk like us. Howard Mohr’s How To Talk Minnesotan: A Visitor’s Guide was a bestseller here in the land of 10,000 lakes, though no one would ever admit to actually purchasing the book. We all borrowed it from someone who was from out of town. In his book he instructed people who were from the south, or either of the coasts, how to fit in while visiting this great north land. While teaching the fine art of using you betcha in a sentence he also illustrated how practical and understated we Minnesotans are.

In Minnesota we have a reason for doing everything. We are not fly by the seat of our pants people and most of our behavior is dictated by the weather. It’s either too hot or, more than likely, too cold in Minnesota to do what we want to do so we patiently wait until the seasons change to do that which we desire.

I ran across this article yesterday from Kare11.com and it struck me that while the story is rather ghastly it perfectly illustrates just how practical and understated Minnesotans are.

According to Kare11.com the remains of a missing woman were found buried under her home recently. Not really news anymore, we hear about this kind of thing everyday, sadly. What is a little different here is the reason she was murdered and how she was buried. Apparently Tamara Lee Mason, who was found buried on her own property, wanted to play Yahtzee with her three children over the winter holidays last December. The children did not want to play and after she got mad and stormed out, one of the boys strangled her and then the others put a plastic bag over her head and secured it with his belt eventually killing her.

No Minnesotan would dispute the use of the belt. It was available and handy. Probably closer to reach than duct tape.

But that isn’t the practical part of the story, though indeed it is very practical to use one’s belt when strangling someone. No, what was practical was that the sons stored her body in a large container, though detouring through South Dakota, and then wisely stored her in the garage until the ground thawed. Why waste energy trying to dig a hole in ground that is frozen solid?

It isn’t clear how the body was discovered, though I would bet it had something to do with foraging animals, however once found the local sheriff summed up the family dynamic as only a true Minnesotan could:

“It is very strange,” Stevens County Sheriff Randy Willis told the Star Tribune Tuesday. “She wanted to play Yahtzee and they didn’t. That seemed to be, in their minds, what expedited her sudden demise.”

Of the family, Willis said, “It’s probably not the most functional family in the world, but it’s not the most dysfunctional, either.”

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