Mark Dayton | Redhead Ranting

Gay Marriage in Minnesota

Filed under Events, Minnesota, politics by Jen on May 13, 2013 at 10:25 am {one comment}

Today the Minnesota Senate votes on whether or not gay people can legally marry someone of the same sex. It’s expected to pass and Governor Dayton has said he will sign the bill if it lands on his desk tomorrow.

It’s about time.

If it passes same – sex marriages can begin August 1st, 2013. Minnesota would be the 12th state to legalize gay marriage.

Currently same-sex marriage is legal in Connecticut, Iowa, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York, Vermont, Maine, Maryland, Washington, the District of Columbia.

I’m thrilled that Minnesota is going to become a state that recognizes marriage equality and am hopeful that the domino effect will take hold and all other states will follow suit.

While views have evolved over the years about gay marriage, there are still many who would prefer to ban gay marriage. I’ll never understand the belief that gays shouldn’t be allowed to marry someone whom they love and who happens to be of the same sex. I don’t understand it because gays can get married, they can only marry someone of the opposite sex which makes for a very difficult and confusing marriage.

I know because I grew up in one them.

Gay people have been getting married since forever so banning gay marriage does nothing but force gay people to marry someone of the opposite sex, someone they may love but ultimately may find difficult to remain committed.

The argument that same-sex marriage erodes traditional marriage is the biggest crock of shit I have ever heard. Straight people have been eroding marriage just fine without the help of gay people. I know I’ve done my part having two marriages – so far.

I can attest to the fact that growing up in a mixed orientation marriage is confusing, shameful, loud and just downright hell. I think most people would agree that growing up with parents who love and respect one another is preferred to one where lying, arguing and sadness are the rule.

I expect this bill to pass, as do many who are opposed to it. The best thing about this issue is that sooner, rather than later, it will simply age out. The people who fear gays will die out. The kids coming up, the ones who will rule this world very soon, don’t care a bit if someone is gay. And that is incredibly refreshing.

Today will be an historic day in Minnesota. Today is the day we vote for the family, for equality and for freedom.

Minnesota gay marriage vote set for today (lacrossetribune.com)
Minnesota’s House of Representatives Passes Gay Marriage Bill 75-59 (queerty.com)
Minnesota Senate To Debate Gay Marriage Bill Monday (ontopmag.com)
Same-Sex Marriage Passes in Minnesota House (usatoday.com)
Minn. Gay Marriage Bill has Last Legislative Step (kstp.com)

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How To Prevent Bullying

Filed under Kids, politics by Jen on March 19, 2012 at 7:07 pm {3 comments}

This morning I learned that Minnesota Governor (D), Mark Dayton’s Anti Bullying Task Force met for the first time today in Roseville. The task force was established to better prevent bullying in our Minnesota schools.

From the Minneapolis Star Tribune:

Attorney General Lori Swanson proposed legislation to require school districts to respond to bullying reports within 24 hours*. The bill also would require districts to create policies for reporting and documenting incidents, plans to protect students who are subject to bullying and those who report it. It was modeled after a law that drew bipartisan support this year in North Dakota.

Dayton reiterated that the task force had been in the works for some time but said he hoped Swanson’s proposal would complement its work. In addition to studying current research, members will look at other states’ laws and school policies, and interview experts, as well as educators, students and their families in hearings held statewide.

Now I’m not a teacher and I’m not a legislator and I’m certainly not a Democrat but I am pretty sure I could save our state a whole bunch of money and time instead of charging a 15 person task force to figure this out. I’m none of those things but I am a mother and I have seen plenty of bullying in my time. There is no way to eliminate bullying, there will always be people who feel power by picking on innocent people, but if you want to prevent kids from getting bullied there are a few things that we can do right away.

Teach kids not to be victims

This isn’t easy, we’ve spent the last 30 plus years teaching not just our kids but our nation how to be a victim of something. If we want to not have our kids fall victim to a bully we have to stop teaching them that it’s okay to be a victim of anything. We need to teach our kids that if someone picks on them they need to stand up and speak up right away.

Return the power to teachers and parents

It shouldn’t take 24 hours for a report to be filed and frankly a report shouldn’t have to be filed (we don’t want to turn bullies into criminals and filing a report sends them down that road by giving them a reputation early on. We want to nip the behavior in the bud). If a teacher see or hears about bullying happening on the playground they should have the power to respond right away. If a parent hears about an incident they shouldn’t have to fill out a form to get action. If a parent witnesses bullying they should feel free to intervene and talk to the children on the spot. Unfortunately most parents today don’t feel they can intervene for fear of lawsuits.

Punish the bully

Don’t suspend the child who bullies give him a public punishment to show him that bullying is not ok. Shame is a powerful tool and we stopped using it to our advantage a long time ago. Most of the kids who do bullying routinely couldn’t care less if they get kicked out school for a couple of days and probably prefer it. Don’t let them off the hook, keep them at school longer by cleaning the erasers (do we still have erasers?) or cleaning the toilets in the school. Give them a punishment that sucks so that maybe they might not do it again for fear they have to scrub out more toilets.

I’m sure there are more things we can do to prevent bullying but do we really need another task force? What happened to common sense? It’s time we started using it again instead of creating more legislation, committees and laws that are worth about as much as the paper they printed on out on the playground. Let’s empower parents, teachers and students so they can prevent bullying before 24 hours has elapsed.

*editor’s emphasis

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Minnesota: Where Even The Criminals Are Practical

Filed under People by Jen on July 13, 2011 at 8:28 pm {19 comments}

Image via Wikipedia

Back in 1987, Howard Mohr wrote a funny little book that taught non natives of Minnesota how to talk like us. Howard Mohr’s How To Talk Minnesotan: A Visitor’s Guide was a bestseller here in the land of 10,000 lakes, though no one would ever admit to actually purchasing the book. We all borrowed it from someone who was from out of town. In his book he instructed people who were from the south, or either of the coasts, how to fit in while visiting this great north land. While teaching the fine art of using you betcha in a sentence he also illustrated how practical and understated we Minnesotans are.

In Minnesota we have a reason for doing everything. We are not fly by the seat of our pants people and most of our behavior is dictated by the weather. It’s either too hot or, more than likely, too cold in Minnesota to do what we want to do so we patiently wait until the seasons change to do that which we desire.

I ran across this article yesterday from Kare11.com and it struck me that while the story is rather ghastly it perfectly illustrates just how practical and understated Minnesotans are.

According to Kare11.com the remains of a missing woman were found buried under her home recently. Not really news anymore, we hear about this kind of thing everyday, sadly. What is a little different here is the reason she was murdered and how she was buried. Apparently Tamara Lee Mason, who was found buried on her own property, wanted to play Yahtzee with her three children over the winter holidays last December. The children did not want to play and after she got mad and stormed out, one of the boys strangled her and then the others put a plastic bag over her head and secured it with his belt eventually killing her.

No Minnesotan would dispute the use of the belt. It was available and handy. Probably closer to reach than duct tape.

But that isn’t the practical part of the story, though indeed it is very practical to use one’s belt when strangling someone. No, what was practical was that the sons stored her body in a large container, though detouring through South Dakota, and then wisely stored her in the garage until the ground thawed. Why waste energy trying to dig a hole in ground that is frozen solid?

It isn’t clear how the body was discovered, though I would bet it had something to do with foraging animals, however once found the local sheriff summed up the family dynamic as only a true Minnesotan could:

“It is very strange,” Stevens County Sheriff Randy Willis told the Star Tribune Tuesday. “She wanted to play Yahtzee and they didn’t. That seemed to be, in their minds, what expedited her sudden demise.”

Of the family, Willis said, “It’s probably not the most functional family in the world, but it’s not the most dysfunctional, either.”

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Gay Marriage in Minnesota